Smoking ain't allowed in school
by Itsmecoon
Summary: This is an AU contest. My prompts were Dean. Neal and Daddy knows best. All I could think of was Father knows best as in Father John. Dean and Neal are in a catholic boy's school. Warning this will contain paddling of school teenagers by their teachers/principal. Please don't read if you won't enjoy.


Author: Itsmecoon Beta: Trumansshell

"Come on Dean. We won't get caught." Neal said trying to reassure him.

"I don't know."

"You scared?"

"Hell no! It's just that I got paddled first period and my backside is warning me not to have a repeat performance today."

"Look, how many times has Brother Bobby kept one of us in his class and not let us go out during Brother Peter's gym class?" Neal questioned.

"Too many to count." Dean answered.

"Okay then, we won't even be missed."

"Alright, let's go."

Dean and Neal snuck away from the crowd and ran for the cemetery. They got to the last crypt and went inside. Many kids hid out in here so there were candles all around. Dean got out matches and lit them. They both sat down to catch their breath. Dean reached into his pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and lit one up.

"You didn't tell me you had cigarettes! Where did you get them?"

"I stole them from the new Janitor."

"Well, what you waiting for, gimme one!"

Neither one of them knew how to really smoke, so they didn't inhale on purpose. Dean accidentally took a breath in while inhaling and started coughing his head off. He felt the rush of the nicotine and got lightheaded and decided he liked that feeling.

"Holy shit Neal, inhale."

Neal did and after the initial coughing he felt the "high" and was floating too.

"This is awesome."

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Brother Bobby was grading the religion tests from first period. He was disappointed in Neal Caffrey's paper. He'd had enough of Neal's smart assed comments so he was headed to the gym to get him from Brother Peter's class and show him exactly what he thought of his answers.

'What is the meaning of Christmas and how was it started?' Brother Bobby mumbled as he walked. 'How dare he say that it's meaning was to reward good kids and punish bad ones and it was started by a fat drunken man in a red suit.'

"Excuse me Brother Peter."

"Brother Bobby, come in. What can I do for you?"

"Would it be possible to get Neal Caffrey? I need to discuss something with him."

"Hang on one minute." He said grabbing the paddle out of the bottom drawer.

"Samuel Winchester, come here please."

Sam looked up and saw Brother Bobby with Brother Peter. He knew Dean, Neal, and he were in deep trouble.

"Yes sir Brother Peter?"

"You know what I want don't you Samuel?"

"Yes sir." Sam said looking down.

"Where are they?"

"I don't know sir."

He grabbed Sam's arm and swatted him once.

"Where are they? I won't ask again."

"Honest, I don't know. They were missing so I just covered for them when you asked me. I didn't see them leave."

"Where do you think they went?" Brother Bobby asked.

"The Cemetery Sir."

"Thank you, sorry for the interruption Brother Peter."

"No problem."

"I guess from now on, I'll send the boys to tell you if I'm keeping them." Brother Bobby said/

"That works. Then I'll give them a swat or two for missing my class and send them back to you." Brother Peter said.

"Maybe that will encourage better behavior from them." Brother Bobby suggested. "Good bye."

"Let's hope so. Good bye" Peter said, "Where do you think you're going young man? Come over here."

Sam did as he was told.

"Now bend over and grab your ankles. Lying isn't tolerated around here and you know it. Count them."

"Yes sir."

WHACK

"One sir."

WHACK

"AHH, two sir."

WHACK

"Oww, three sir."

WHACK

"Ow ow ow, four sir." Sam said with tears running down his cheeks.

WHACK

Ahhh Sam jumped up and grabbed his backside trying to rub the sting out.

"Back into position now!"

Sam scrambled to get back into position, bending over and grabbing his ankles.

"Yes sir, I'm sorry sir."

"That didn't count."

WHACK right on the sit spots and top of the thighs.

"OWWWW Five sir."

WHACK same place Sam was rocking to stay in position.

"Ahhh, six sir." Sam cried barely understandable.

Brother Peter laid down the paddle, opened the top drawer of his desk and walked back to where Sam was still in position and said,

"Stand up Samuel."

Sam obeyed immediately, his hands frantically trying to rub the pain away.

"Stop that." He yelled at Sam and swatted him. "No rubbing. You know better than to lie. Open you mouth and stick out your tongue."

"I won't do it again. Please don't Brother Peter." Sam begged.

"You have two choices, open your mouth and stick out your tongue or get back into position for round two followed by you still opening your mouth and sticking out your tongue."

Sam closed his eyes, opened his mouth, and stuck out his tongue. Brother Peter opened the bottle, poured some of the contents on his finger, then proceeded to rub the most foul tasting stuff all over Sam's mouth and tongue.

"Go face the corner until I release you. Hand's on you head."

Sam stood in the corner with his hands on his head, crying and wishing he'd never tried to cover for Dean and Neal.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Dean and Neal were on their second cigarette when the door to the crypt was thrown open. They quickly scrambled to their feet, trying to hide the evidence. Of course they weren't successful. They were caught skipping and smoking.

"Give me the pack."

Dean reached in his pocket and handed it to him.

"WITH ME!" was the only thing Brother Bobby said.

Neal and Dean quietly walked head down behind Brother Bobby. They got really nervous when he walked past his classroom and straight towards Father John's office. Neither of them had ever been punished by him before and were terrified. Neal and Dean looked at each other and both mouthed, "Sorry." Neal was sorry for convincing Dean to skip and Dean was sorry for the cigarettes.

They got to the outer office and walked in.

"Corners!" Brother Bobby yelled and each boy ran to stand in the corner, putting hands on his head.

Bobby knocked and entered when he was granted permission.

"Brother Bobby, how may I help you?" Father John asked.

"Father, I have two boys standing in the corner in the outer office."

"I see what have they done?"

"They were caught skipping and smoking."

"Who are they?"

"Neal Caffrey and Dean Winchester sir. Dean had the cigarettes sir."

"I see. Thank you Brother Bobby. I'll handle it from here. I'll send them to their rooms when I've finished with them. I will instruct the kitchen staff that they will spend the weekend in their rooms reflecting on their behavior."

"I have a problem I need to discuss with Neal about."

"Go ahead."

Bobby walked over to Neal and said,

"Neal, face me."

He held up Neal's paper.

"This is unacceptable!"

"Yes Sir."

"Hold out your hands."

Brother Bobby picked up a ruler and whacked the palms of Neal's hands once each and said,

"If you repeat that, I'll repeat this understand?"

"Yes Brother."

"Turn back around until you're called."

It didn't take long. Father John opened his door and said,

"Boys, come in please."

They walked in and were scared to death. They saw a table with ropes tied to it, a cabinet full of different sized canes, paddles hung on the wall along with a thick leather belt. Father Johnhad to turn to stifle a chuckle, first timers were so much fun. There was no place to sit down so the boys stood at attention in front of his desk. He circled around them tapping a ruler against his palm. They jumped every time they heard the thwack.

"So, which one of you is Dean?"

"I...I am sir."

"Dean where did you get the cigarettes?"

"I got them from the new Janitor."

"Okay, I guess I'll have to let him go."

"What?" Dean yelled.

"Giving cigarettes to under-aged kids won't be tolerated here."

"Don't fire him sir, I took them, he didn't give them to me."

"Thanks for your honesty Dean. Hold out your hands."

He whacked Dean with the ruler he was holding once on each palm. Then he continued as if nothing happened.

"So let me get this straight, you ditched class, stole cigarettes, and smoked them?"

"Yes sir."

"Neal, what was your role in this mess?"

"I intentionally made Brother Bobby angry with a test I took."

"Didn't he handle that?"

He held up his hands and said,

"He whacked me with a ruler sir."

"Okay, what else?"

"I convinced Dean to skip with me and I smoked along with him."

"Well, you both understand you'll be punished correct?"

"Yes Father." They both echoed.

"I want you both to walk over to the table, bend over it and grab the other side. Don't let go until I give you permission."

They both obeyed. The table was just the right height so that they were on their tip toes to be able to reach the other side. Father John walked over and ran his hand through the canes. He heard both boys take in a deep breath and let it out as he passed them. Then he took the belt off the wall, doubled it over and snapped it loudly causing them both to jump. He folded the belt and started to walk behind the boys when he shook his head and said,

"This won't do." and laid it on the table between them.

Their eyes were as big as saucers seeing the belt that close to them. Then he took the paddle off the wall, walked behind them. He rested the paddle against Dean's sit spots, raised it up and brought it down with a loud thwack. Dean hissed. He stepped over to Neal and repeated the same process. Neal hissed.

Father John continued to go from boy to boy until they had each received six licks and were crying steadily. They were doing everything they could do to move away from the sting. Everything that is except let go.

"Have you boys learned your lesson about skipping classes?"

"Yes Father." they cried.

Tears flowed harder when it sunk in that he said for skipping classes only nothing about the smoking. He let them hold position for a few minutes before he said,

"Stand up and face me."

They obeyed. They were struggling not to reach back and rub.

"Smoking is a nasty habit and one not tolerated here. It's almost as bad as lying. Therefore, you will get the same punishment I give liars. Open your mouths and stick out your tongues."

He grabbed a bottle out of his desk and proceeded to rub this nasty stuff all around their mouths and tongues. The taste was horrible.

"You both are grounded in your rooms for the weekend. You will both write 1000 sentences each day. Saturday you will write, (I will not smoke.) and Sunday you will write, (I will not skip class.) Is that clear to you both?"

"Yes Father." They echoed.

"Good, then there's only one thing left to take care of."

Both boys looked at each other not knowing what else was coming.

"Dean back over the table, please."

Dean didn't say anything he just shakily bend back over and grabbed the other side. Father John grabbed the paddle and handed it to Neal.

"What's this for?"

"For you to paddle Dean."

"What?" They both echoed.

"If Dean wouldn't have stolen the cigarettes, then you wouldn't have been caught smoking. How many did you smoke?"

"Two sir."

"Then give Dean two licks and he better feel them or you'll repeat them until he does."

Neal didn't know what to do. He didn't want to do this but he wasn't given a choice. Dean made it easier for him by giving him his famous smile and a wink.

He took position behind Dean and gave him two hard licks. Dean remained stoic so his friend didn't get too upset.

"Now switch places and Dean give Neal two for convincing you to skip."

They did as they were told but Neal wasn't as stoic as Dean was. Father John sat on the edge of his desk.

"Come here boys."

They came and stood in front of the man. He reached up, ran his hand down their cheeks and said,

"Sorry to be so harsh with you boys but as the song goes, {Smoking ain't allowed in school.}"

"That's not quite true Father." Dean piped up.

"What do you mean by that young man?" Father John said standing up.

"You do allow one kind of smoking in school."

"What kind is that?"

"Smoking butts." Dean said rubbing his backside.

Dean and Neal both busted out laughing. Father John couldn't help but join in.

"Both of you get out of here before I see how big of I fire I can light in your backsides."

"Yes Father. Sorry." Neal said.

"Me too." Dean added. "And as they say, Father know best."

The End!


End file.
